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life
understand
Should you tell a non-native English speaker that their answers are mostly unintelligible?
We have a few members here who love to weigh in on everything yet I can't make heads or tails of their writing — even after a reread or two. They then complain about being collapsed or down-voted. Should someone explain to them that they grossly overestimated their English skills? If so, how?
lifeunderstand
When I'm not sounding blunt or condescending; to people who aren't native English speakers on my 99% days of being nice, I'm sounding overbearing and arrogant to them. The Internet world is the most people world, not my British world.
When I don't understand someone's answer, I clarify something I understand about it or ask to confirm that I know they understand for more detail. I wouldn't want to stick my foot in it and go round in circles with people who don't understand English, so by confirming something, they can explain themselves to me, without them knowing that I find their English a problem.
When I disagree with someone, I have to be soft-spoken and helpful about it; because if I was speaking normally with them, I guarantee this will happen.
They will not be able to understand the words I use, or be able to compete with the persuasive language I have.
Have you ever had someone disagree with you about something, they're talking with a lot of clever words, and no matter how much you want to say what you have to say, you just can't find the words to express what you want to express?
That's what it's like. So I have to sugar coat the way I talk to those people, so that it's possible for both of us to have a conversation about disagreeing. I wouldn't want to have that person decide they can't talk to me again about things - frustrated.
It's about letting them know that they have more or equal control in the conversation you are having, when actually you have the control. They just don't know that. ;) If you can't get to say all you wanted to say, it doesn't matter. You still win.