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Why do some women who describe themselves as feminists still want men to pay for them on dates?

feminism

intergender dynamics

society

understand

tynamite

2012 answer

Because they are a faux feminist.

They are the sort of "feminists", who promote equal rights for women; but at the same time, will exploit being a women, riding on gender inequality when it suits them. Their duplicity will let you know, that these women do not truly strive for equality.

All they do, is strive for getting treat the same as men; and then be treat like a woman, when they see that the sexist and stereotypical roles can benefit them. That is oppressive, and it denies men from exploiting being men, while women can continue exploiting being women; so you could argue that these some feminists, of which you speak of, are anti-men. Imagine if men started doing that.

What if men insisted at women paying them for the date, while at the same time, decide where the date should be held. That's what these so-called faux feminists are doing. If men are paying for the date, why should women ultimately choose where it is? What if men decided that they should choose where the date out of equality, as women usually choose; and then duplicitiously decide that women should pay for it? That's what these faux feminists are doing.

A real feminist doesn't want men to hold open doors or pull out a seat for them just because they are a woman. This is because real feminists aim to cause gender equality and be seen as an equal to men. They do not encourage stereotypical chauvinistic male provider and subservient women roles, and hope for the day in the 21st century, that they can be liberated from those outdated roles. This is why those women do not want men to automatically pay for them on dates. That would take feminism back 100 years (like in Twilight), and take away all the things that women fought for, in terms of job pay and hierachy equality.

By the way, I have nothing against women wanting men to pay for the dates. It's only on the third date and onwards, where I would have a problem with that. Someone has to draw the line.

2019 answer

Power is a zero sum game. It is like a game of othello. If I am having an argument with someone, and they slap me in the face, they have taken away some of my power, and transferred it to themselves. Feminism is about increasing women's relative power in relation to men. It is not about making men and women have absolutely equal power in all aspects of life.