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How can one surround themselves with people that lead them to become overly-narcissistic?
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categorysociety
typeunderstand
tynamite
tynamite's avatar While Brent Finley is right about the question's premise being wrong and having the cause and effect backwards, it is also possible to raise your children in order so they become narcissistic or have narcissistic values.

This reminds me of my childhood.

Keep in mind that I am not a narcissist and do not have Narcissitic Personality Disorder. I was tested for every disablity, emotional and behavioural disorder you can think of at 3, and I got the all clear.

When my family was outside walking somewhere when I young enough to be in nursery, my older brother and sister would walk in front of me because they were older and quicker. All three of us weren't holding hands. I would complain to mum and she would tell the other two to slow down, so I could be in front. Another example is when I used to take one of my brother's imaginary toys off him and get upset and say "You're stealing the fun" so I would take all the toys off him, in an attempt to get the imaginative fun from the toys that he had. Also I would be allowed to eat yoghurts and cereal every day instead of normal food except dinner unlike my other siblings which gave me special treatment for a claim that I could only eat those things that was made up.

Not only was I called cute by adults who saw me lying in a buggy but I also had that treatment in school by girls in the class and my older sister's friends who is 3 years older than me, which is a huge huge gap in primary school when they're mentally much more mature than you and are much taller that it scares you. I was the shiznit!

Also everywhere I went, I was adored. There was no such thing as this group likes me and this group doesn't, it was every group! I could afford and get away with not talking to my friends for weeks, and them be happy with me after those weeks as if nothing happened. I'm not even walking from person A to person B. I was gliding. My foot never stepped on the ground. It hovered above it for the whole time, because I was always above it.

I learnt three things.


  • Entitlement.(my emphasis of this word is very intentional)
  • Idolisation
  • Prevalence


Add those things together, and what do you get narcissism.
I literally thought I was the best person in the world until I got bulled at 9, but that faded before then as I moved to a different school at 7.

Let's not get it twisted. Everyone has traces of every disorder to some extent, whether that be paranoid, schizoid, schizotypal, antisocial, borderline, histronic, narcissism, avoidant, dependant or obsessive-compulsive, the whole lot. Everyone has some of those traits to some extent, if you really think about it. People can have those traits without having the associated disorders, as long as our emotions are kept under control.

Fast forward to now, and how I am treat on Quora is much similar to how I was treat back then. Unsolicited attention and people clamouring for my attention and approval.

The moral of this story is, if you have kids, don't teach them entitlement. That just because someone else has something, doesn't mean that they have to have it, because they are them.

There's a phrase I use called "satisfaction of presence" which means that someone only want something because they see someone else with it. So in a way, they don't really want it. They only want it present. Satisfaction of presence can be a dangerous thing if not kept in moderation, so if you have kids, don't teach them entitlement. You don't know what that is going to do to your child. I turned out fine though. I was officially classed free of all disorders at 3 years old, so I'm safe! And besides, I've grown out of that narcissistic behaviour, that was just a childhood phase that never lasted long. (I was sad about other things at that time, so maybe I split to have an opposing side of narcissism which is a contrast, but that's enough talking about that, as if I somehow have a perfect balance.) For me everything balanced out anyway, as my once extreme shyness was the opposite causing me all sorts of problems, so I was split into 2, with my main self being vanilla plain.

Seriously though, the people who attention seek, are the saddest people in life. Narcissists don't necessarily attention seek, but if you the OP want to surround yourself by overly narcissistic people, then that means that you do want to attention seek, so because you do, that means that deep down, behind all your front-facing emotions, you are truly sad inside. Simple as that!

Well anyway, if you want to be narcissistic, you have to put yourself in an environment where you are (or can be) given entitlement, idolisation, and prevalence; as if you were Paris Hilton (actor) or Kanye West (musician). Once you are in that environment, act accordingly.

Good luck trying to gain a cult following of people who appreciate you and want your approval. Ciao!
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Richer people have better health.

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