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society
understand
What good responses help a kid who asks "Am I weird?"
I think I am weird. Someone says I am weird. What does weird mean? Am I weird?
Is it bad? Is it good? Is it weird?
Help me.
Is it bad? Is it good? Is it weird?
Help me.
societyunderstand
If someone asks whether they're selfish, 9 times out of 10, they're selfish. If they weren't selfish, they wouldn't have to ask.
Your child isn't attention seeking when they ask this, and the question they're asking isn't a positive, so although you know what the real answer is, you should lie.
The lie you should make
Why you should lie.
Why you should lie.
Because it's tactful.
I don't know how things are where you live, but where I live, the word weird has negative connotations, hence it being a pejorative. Being weird isn't celebrated, because people want to be normal, not different.
And when I use the word different, I mean from the perspective of someone who doesn't want to feel that they are so different, that they cannot converse or relate to normal people, and cannot relate to them. That they are too far removed from everyone else.
Also keep in mind that children constantly aim to claim their position in the house, and that teenagers are constantly finding themselves. Teenagers are discovering their sexuality, who they are, what they're good at, their good qualities, their confidence, self-esteem, everything.
Your brutal honesty could have your children internalising the things they need not care about. Do you really want to tell your teenage daughter who took 2 hours getting ready for high school, that she's weird, after she had to deal with bitches and jerks for 6 hours? Also you don't need your young child internalising that shit. You can't have your child caring about what others think of them, to that extent!
Ignorance is bliss.
If you want to teach your child the tools they need to get along with people, social skills are learnt though intuition and instinct, so instead teach them to have pride in themselves. If you teach your child to have pride in himself or herself, and encourage them to be happy with the good things they do when they're kind to people, that'll be enough to help them get along with others, and conform enough around people without actually conforming.
Imagine someone who conforms their behaviour to fit in, but doesn't actually conform in the true sense of the word, because they don't compromise on their morals. That would be what your child would be if you taught them pride.
The lie you should make
Because it's tactful.
I don't know how things are where you live, but where I live, the word weird has negative connotations, hence it being a pejorative. Being weird isn't celebrated, because people want to be normal, not different.
And when I use the word different, I mean from the perspective of someone who doesn't want to feel that they are so different, that they cannot converse or relate to normal people, and cannot relate to them. That they are too far removed from everyone else.
Also keep in mind that children constantly aim to claim their position in the house, and that teenagers are constantly finding themselves. Teenagers are discovering their sexuality, who they are, what they're good at, their good qualities, their confidence, self-esteem, everything.
Your brutal honesty could have your children internalising the things they need not care about. Do you really want to tell your teenage daughter who took 2 hours getting ready for high school, that she's weird, after she had to deal with bitches and jerks for 6 hours? Also you don't need your young child internalising that shit. You can't have your child caring about what others think of them, to that extent!
Ignorance is bliss.
If you want to teach your child the tools they need to get along with people, social skills are learnt though intuition and instinct, so instead teach them to have pride in themselves. If you teach your child to have pride in himself or herself, and encourage them to be happy with the good things they do when they're kind to people, that'll be enough to help them get along with others, and conform enough around people without actually conforming.
Imagine someone who conforms their behaviour to fit in, but doesn't actually conform in the true sense of the word, because they don't compromise on their morals. That would be what your child would be if you taught them pride.